From Parties to Crawls Here’s What To Look for For Each Event
The Christmas season is more than just presents and pretending to like family. There are a lot of reasons to dress up and show your spirit. Here are the six difference events and why there are different types of Ugly Christmas Sweaters for each one.
The Office Ugly Christmas Party Sweater (or suit or dress)
This one requires real thought. There are a lot of pitfalls here. Start with our guide to the The Best Ugly Christmas Sweater Ideas for Work.
We also got specific about what will get you a one way trip to the human resources office in 10 Ugly Christmas Sweaters You Can’t Wear to The Office.
This green Christmas tree sweater by Tipsy Elves is a classic and I wore it to a client’s office in 2018. It has actual garland and decorations attached to it but can be a little hot for indoors.
Ugly Christmas Suits
An ugly Christmas suit works really well here. It usually isn’t too heavy, plays off the office theme and typically isn’t too political or topical.
This mens ugly Christmas suit comes with LEDs and three different designs. The lights are even more tacky and attention getting.
The men’s ugly Christmas suit avoids a lot of pitfalls. But try not to buy the first one you see. At a large party a lot of other people may think of the same thing.
Men’s Gaudy Garland Sweater
Has Real Ornaments
LED Light Up Ugly Christmas
3-Piece Holiday Party Suit
Pleated Skater Tank Dress
Ugly Christmas Dress
There are also ugly Christmas dresses that accomplish the same thing. This one comes available more than a dozen different holiday prints is adorable and really inexpensive.
You can go as elegant, cute and super tacky as you want. But, many also offer better options when you don’t want to wear a sweater.
The most important thing is to think about the culture of your company and the people at it. You can get away with a few different things at a marketing agency in San Francisco than an big corporate insurance company in the Midwest. Think about the types of discussion topics and jokes that would and wouldn’t be acceptable in the office on any given day.
Just because you work with people doesn’t mean you really know them. The best way to find out how sensitive people are is to (literally) wear something on your chest to test it out. So avoid politics, words or phrases you wouldn’t say in the office, sex, religion, etc.
Next consider the kind of event it is. Outside events can be cold so you don’t want to be so cold in many places you have to cover up you clever kitsch with an overcoat. But by the same token, last year my long sleeve, Christmas tree sweater had me sweating all over.
Next, what kind of attention you want to get. You sweater will be a great topic of conversation so make sure it is a conversation you want to have. So it you want to talk about Trump the whole party then go ahead with that Make Christmas Great Again sweater but don’t say we didn’t warn you.
Conclusion: A novelty suit is great or a middle of the road humorous ugly Christmas sweater that isn’t too hot.
Santa Crawls and Bar Crawls
This one is great. If you have never been to a bar crawl work like this. There is usually a set schedule of bars walking distance from one another. Some crawls have you start and stop together but most either let you go on your own or just fall into chaos over time.
Depending upon your approach to drinking you may want to go into this assuming you will ruin the sweater and lose any accessories you are wearing or carrying. Less is more and I wouldn’t wear anything you think you will need for a different event later.
When considering the different types of Ugly Christmas sweaters, consider avoiding ones with things hanging on them. Tinsel, small characters, toys or Christmas decorations are fun on a sweater but will all get damaged, caught on people or knocked to the floor in a typical crowded bar. Stick with sweaters that rely on the knitting or illustrations to make the joke.
These are best to bring a group of people and many of them get really crowded. Christmas bar crawls are a sea of red and green. Something less traditional may help you to stand out. So a pro tip is to coordinate your sweaters.
Humorous and pop culture ones work better than more explicit ones if you are looking to be approachable by people. There are hundreds of options including retro references and newer shows and characters.
We think The Office, Friends and 80’s pop stars will hold up well but suggest you skip Game of Thrones and Stranger Things which we think peaked last year and you won’t want to wear in 2020. If you are buying early, which we suggest, then you may want to skip references to aging personalities…umm, just in case.
You can all wear the same one and it makes it easier to find your group and when you socialize with other people it gives you an additional topic to discuss. Do the Carlton!
Dressing for the Santa Crawl
Regency Plush Santa Suit With Gloves
A Santa Crawl is like a bar crawl but everyone dresses as Santa.
Here is all you need to know about choosing a Santa costume for a Santa crawl.
First, definitely dress as Santa. The fun comes from being in a sea of Santa costumes. Do not wear a high quality Santa suit. There is extra fun in really lame Santa costumes.
Don’t bother with the accessories. Santa Crawls are not about authenticity. Gloves, beards and gift sacks are all going to end up ruined or lost. The beards are itchy and annoying and really likely to end up on the ground.
Remember you have to walk outside and then spend long times inside getting increasingly hammered. If you expect there will be a huge discrepancy between inside and outside temperature then maybe split the difference. So try to wear something that is tolerable for both and leave the overcoat at home.
Santa Crawls are prone to extreme crowding, especially if a few hundred people show up an an already full bar. So anticipate standing outdoors waiting to get in.
Conclusion: for bar crawls and Santa crawls you can go much crazier and adult if you want. But, choose a unique but less costly and funny ugly sweater that is middle weight and doesn’t have anything attached. Also avoid elaborate, fragile or expensive accessories.
The Adult Ugly Christmas Sweater Party
Depending on the specifics, adult ugly Christmas sweater parties give you the most options in the types of ugly Christmas sweaters you choose from.
Assuming it is people your own age and no senior citizens or kids then some options open up. In some case, the guide for office parties can be flipped on its head. Get risque or more than a little dirty.
Don’t look at Amazon top sellers here. You risk looking like everyone else. A second hand store or a more obscure sweater may be the way to go. Uniqueness will play best here.
Trump Christmas Sweaters will be HUUUGE!
We wrote a whole guide to the top Trump Ugly Christmas Sweaters. They are even bigger for 2019. There are a lot of new options this year. Know your crowd. In some circles an impeachment ugly Christmas sweater will draw a laugh and some fun conversation and in others it will lead to an argument and that isn’t why (most) people go to a party.
Naughty Ugly Christmas Sweaters
Naughty themed sweaters are a great choice and the best types of Ugly Christmas Sweaters. So, we wrote the definitive guides to the best naughty, dirty and offensive ugly Christmas sweaters.
There are hundreds to choose from. Think twice before wearing them out to your local watering hole unless you don’t care if families eating dinner have to see them.
The “Ask Your Mom If I’m Real” ugly Christmas sweater is a favorite around here. This style is a little different from the popular ones last year so it still looks fresh.
Conclusion: surprise them and take some chances but think about the responses and the tone you are setting.
Holiday Festivals
Walking with your special someone, sipping mulled wine or cocoa (if you are lame) and holiday music drifting through the air.
Even more than in an office setting remember there will be families here. Does the constitution protect your right to wear a sweater that shows boning reindeer? Maybe but just don’t be that person.
Remember you are outside so consider the weather. Most types of Ugly Christmas Sweaters are likely to be polyester and other unnatural fibers. This is especially true of inexpensive ones. So think about your comfort.
Traditional and light works better. If you are super creative and funny you may spend a lot of time having the same brief conversation with total strangers instead of soaking in the holiday joy.
In a crowd any political, sexual or religious themed shirt risks eliciting a response. So dress accordingly and keep it light hearted. It doesn’t matter if you are right, do you really want to spend the evening arguing with strangers instead of sipping eggnog?
Conclusion: dress for the weather and don’t be a jerk
Family Holiday
You know your family more than most. Remember that uncomfortable topic a few conversations ago? Don’t be the relative who causes that at Christmas. Also, you are going to be inside a lot so nothing too hot.
If you are going as a couple consider that. Your friends may think it’s gross but your grandma may think it is adorable.
Since you are opening gifts that can be a cute theme as well. This one works for two audiences. Younger hipper people see the gaudy irony but your aunt may think it’s and sincere.
Conclusion: listen to your inner voice
Christmas Shopping
This is one where I suggest leaving it home. For starters, you are shopping indoors think about the temperature. If you wouldn’t wear any sweater then don’t bother with a Christmas sweater. If you would consider something more breathable like a cardigan.
You can show your spirit through a shirt instead and still have fun with these 6 Types of Ugly Christmas Sweaters.
Conclusion: skip it and remember you don’t control mall heaters.
